Yesterday evening I spent some time reading a meditation book I got for Christmas. I've been going to meditation classes for three years now, and they're great, and I love the people I meet there, but in between them, typically I spend more time reading about it than doing it. But the bit I was reading last night suggested asking yourself: "Why do I want to meditate?" and writing down as many answers as you can come up with. So I gave it a go, and filled up a side of my A5 notebook with the following (which I write here without editing, so there's probably some duplication):
- To find peace, calmness, equanimity.
- To be happy.
- To still the thoughts.
- To kill the dragons.
- To stop myself hurting myself.
- To find out who I am.
- To prove that I can do it.
- To prove it to myself.
- To stop wanting what I can't have.
- To allow myself to do what I need to do.
- To find a place to be me.
- To understand who I am.
- To be able to help others.
- To be able to manage my emotions.
- To be able to see the beauty of the world.
- To learn compassion.
- To learn to focus.
- To learn how to rest.
- To find a place from which I can move forward.
- To find the path and follow it.
- To become a kinder person.
The next exercises were to write down my values, what is important to me; and to describe my "vision", my map for where I am and where I want to me. I think I'll blog those another day.
