So you just lost your job and you are overwhelmed with worry. No doubt the stress level is off the charts. How will you pay your bills? What about the kids needs? This is an awful feeling that far too many have suffered or are suffering as we speak.
The remedy though is in finding new employment. It may be quite difficult but it is a realistic solution. And as severe as the stress and fear can be this is not the same as clinical depression.
Perhaps you have had the horrible misfortune of losing a spouse or child to death. The grief and pain from this event can be catastrophic. This may present a prolonged agony and sadness. And yet clinical depression is different from this also.
These are just two example of events that can bring great sorrow and cause many problems. However if you hear or know of someone who is depressed in the medical sense this is not the same ailment.
Concerning someone who is Bi-Polar this is just one of two disorders that is faced. It is manifested in many ways. The person will be "empty" and can appear hollow. (although most of us can hide the hollow look) This also may lead to them being very anxious and paranoid. Extreme weight loss or weight gain is usually present. Extreme sleeping difficulties like insomnia or oversleeping. Very irritable. Feeling of despair and hopelessness. One cannot concentrate or think clearly. Very forgetful and unable to face issues or make decisions. Loss of interest in activity that was formerly enjoyed. The person finds it hard to be awake when they need to be awake and can't stay asleep when they need to sleep. Very sluggish. Relentless pain all over the body that does not respond to treatment. And worst of all feelings of suicide and a thought that death is the only way these things will stop.
An interesting aspect of this disease is that it is not contingent on any particular event. A depressed person may have many great things going for them and it will not stop these feelings. Whether you are wealthy or poor or employed or unemployed. You may have the greatest family or the most dysfunctional family. The depression is from an internal source. Now the events surrounding your life may add to or give some form of a distraction to your real problem but that is all that can be expected. Your depression and mood stems from an illness.
Understanding all of this can result in others being supportive of those who suffer from clinical depression. Refrain from suggesting that they can get over it or will it away. Because that is not possible. It is best not to imply that everyone goes through this type of "struggle" because most of us do not experience clinical depression. Chances are you do not know how a depressed person feels so don't think it is helpful to say that you do. It is best to just try and listen. You may try and carefully reason with the person that some or most of what they are feeling is a result of their depression. Discuss with them that as real as their depression is they also have reason to continue to move forward. Help them to find or cultivate joy despite their despondent approach to everything.
Illustrate to them that like a garden good things can grow even in the worst of conditions and soil. They have a real serious health condition but there is room to add something positive aside form the pain and sorrow.
In fact mildly discuss with them that joy and happiness is something that we have to work at. Like a garden. Remind them that it may not make their depression go away but their depression does not have to rob them of joy either. Just remember to be very careful not to suggest or hint that this will make their depression go away. Sadly if you are Bi-Polar it will come and go without any hope of the cycles ending.
Fortunately there are some people who suffer temporary forms of clinical depression and it is realistic to expect to get better. However leave that to the medical profession to discuss this with the patient. If they have a indefinite form of depression a doctor will be able to help them. As a friend just help them endure.
Yes we all face adversity and tragedy in our life. But do not confuse extreme or moderate sadness with clinical depression. That doesn't mean that having terrible things happen is trivial it just means it isn't the same thing.
If you have someone or know of someone who is Bi-Polar or Uni-Polar be patient with them. There is an internal torment that they are dealing with that is worse than you could imagine. I know because I live it.
