Whether or not you choose to use medications to treat depression, changing behavior and thoughts are also critical steps.
There are two problems with depression: the negative cycle it gets us in, and the falsehoods we tend to believe while depressed.
Falsehoods
When we are depressed, we believe that “cocooning” such as staying in bed all day, reading a novel, playing games on the computer, or watching tv will make us feel better. We believe that it is too difficult to get up and do the things we need to do and we believe that we are unable to manage our lives. So we don't. This leads to the other problem: the negative cycle.
Negative Cycle
When we choose to cocoon in some way, then we are actually making things worse instead of better. Not only do our responsibilities pile up, but they become even more overwhelming. We think: I can't do this. I don't do this. Everything piles up. I can't do this…
Getting into a Positive Cycle: Activities
In contrast, if we know intellectually that depression lies to us and that the negative cycle only makes things worse, then there are things we can actually do even though we don't FEEL like doing them. The positive cycle goes like this: I am going work on this. I worked on it. I have successfully dealt with some of my responsibilities. I am capable. I am going to work on this…
The Flylady (flylady.net) suggests doing something for just fifteen minutes (or even fewer minutes if everything is really a struggle). She tells people to use a timer. Her website and her e-mail service, which are ostensibly about cleaning, offer many activities that can move a person into a positive cycle.
Choosing to do something for fifteen minutes begins to break the negative cycle and chases away depression's lies. After actually doing something, you often feel better-especially if you make wise choices about what you choose to do. Picking up the room you are in is a good first choice. It will probably take less than fifteen minutes to put things away and throw out the trash. With your leftover minutes, you can do a quick vacuuming or swipe everything with a dust rag.
Another good activity is to take a short walk (fifteen minutes). Walking actually gets the “feel good” chemicals moving in your brain. If the weather is bad, do some other exercise (remember jumping jacks?). If you feel physically lousy, do some gentle stretches to soft music for fifteen minutes.
You can also take something you dread and deal with it for fifteen minutes. When that fifteen minutes is up, you will not require yourself to deal with it again for awhile. Paying bills or making a difficult phone call can give you a feeling of relief when it is over.
Then you can celebrate-do something that is fun for a few minutes and then choose another job to work on for fifteen minutes. It's not about completing everything in fifteen minutes-it's about breaking large tasks into smaller ones that are less overwhelming and more do-able.
Getting into a Positive Cycle: Environment
Listen to music that supports a positive mood-not angry or sad music. I don't know of anyone who can be depressed around a Cajun accordion or a bluegrass banjo, and I also find Baroque (Bach, Vivaldi) and Classical era music (Haydn, Mozart) to support good feelings. Classical music from India gives me a peaceful feeling.
A chaotic environment is depressing. I have found that when I eliminate clutter, as the Flylady suggests, I can keep my home cleaner which gives me a better sense of control in my life. I try to keep each room as simple as I can and it really helps.
Getting into a Positive Cycle: Focus on Others
I have been a teacher for many years and I have a strong commitment to my work, which means I will go to work no matter how I feel unless I am contagious. What I have found is that depression will lie to me: “I really don't want to go to work. I really don't want to do this. It's too much to do…” When I get there and start teaching, my whole attitude changes. I start focusing on my students and their needs and suddenly I don't feel bad.
A volunteer job of some sort often puts us in touch with people who have significant struggles. This can lead to counting one's blessings instead of thinking so much about the things that are wrong. Additionally, helping others is one of the greatest feelings in the world.
Mind Over Feelings
Using intellect to make positive choices rather than being controlled by negative feelings will not all by itself change your feelings permanently or even very quickly. Depression feels like you are crawling through jello all the time and it is very hard to make better choice when the feelings are overwhelming.
However, any effort made in the direction of good mental health is a triumph and over time every little action adds up to eventually feeling competent and reasonably happy.
