While pondering about what to write about lately, I suddenly realized there is one interesting topic I could relate to. Nearing the fourth month of my second pregnancy and the woes that go with it, I thought, why not write about it? Document it and, (with much optimism), help my husband come out of bewilderment. It appears to me that he hasn't fully fathomed my condition just yet ;)
So, what is it about this phase which precedes motherhood? It varies per individual and per pregnancy but a few of these "wonders" will be told in this piece.
In a woman's life, it is a phase of confused senses. On the onset of hormonal changes, she begins to absurdly love what she used to detest. At the same time, hate what was endearing. Husband and wife's Intimacy level shoots down because she can't stand any scent of him. His after-shave, his perfume (which she, in fact, gave him in their last anniversary), his face cleanser, moisturizer…just about everything in him smells revolting. Poor Mr Metrosexual aspirant ; ( He would have to postpone his vanity for the time being. And that other desireof his, he may have to time it when she is in the right mood.
Another piece of this puzzle is that a health buff lady surges with uncontrollable junk food appetite. There are days when she devours everything edible. Races down to the kitchen cupboard, rummaging for midnight meals. The office desk once cluttered with confidential company documents are set to the side making room for snacks of every kind. At lunch breaks, she'd sneak to the nearby fast food and savor her fries as she dunks each string unto her beloved chocolate sundae.
On the contrary, there are days when food taste awfully bland. As if she has undergone chemotherapy with the metallic taste ruling her palate! Worse days render her nauseous and uninterested in anything -. Not even water. The sight of food makes her flinch. With unpredictable cravings, how can she subsist on this unorthodox ritual?
In addition to the baffling appetite, Emotions spiral, err, swerve in unimaginable directions too. The once lion-hearted Mrs Sheds tears over the latest Ugly Betty episode. Why has she turned soft of heart overnight? Why does the voice of that geeky guy across her desk annoy her when all he said was "Good morning”? Why is she irritated for no reason at all? These days, there ARE wrong colors, wrong tone, wrong scent, wrong answers --- Any of these, can send her to fits. Is she losing the plot? She feels like her husband must be sensitive to her whenever and wherever they are. Make one wrong move Mr, and you're in for a duel which the Mrs is intent to win.
Not too absurdly, she reckons ALL babies are adorable. Anybody mean to these little angels are antagonistic creatures she feels too cross to talk to. Why can anybody be so mean to them? Give them what they want, give them chic rooms to sleep in, toys to cuddle --- everything please for the dear teeny angel. She would spend a fortune getting ready for her own little one to come.
As often the case, the woman feels defenseless against the internal upheaval she wakes up to everyday. What is good about the morning when all she sees in the mirror is a scruffy fashion victim? Baggy clothes, excess fat, acne attack, and those dark lines running across her neck! How rude was that lady at the grocery check out to point out your lovely black necklace.!!! Oh, not only that --- and she has to be careful not to let her top show a slight peek of her bulging abdomen. No amount of Shea butter and wonder oils could prevent this belly catastrophe of over-stretched skin. Makes her wonder how the Hollywood celebrity moms camouflage theirs.
Seems like the world has brought about sudden changes which only she notices! Even gravity seems to have altered for she often wobbles even on a flat surface! What is wrong with the world today??? And yesterday, and the other day???
One night she decided to retire early in bed. To hide away from all that drives her nuts...After two hours she woke up hurrying to pee. Oh, she must have drunk too much! Went back to bed and snoozed. Again, she had to rush to the toilet with her kidneys ready to unload, again! This mini-expedition to the loo was repeated three more times until the wee hours. The Mr commented "What is wrong with you dear, you keep on jolting the bed?” And then the Mrs snapped - “WHAT!?!”
Last night, she was sleeping well until she was suddenly roused by an odd feeling on her left leg. The slightest movement triggers an agonizing sting brought about by a major nerve that seems to have coiled up in all the wrong places. Oooh, nothing she does mends the pain. All she could do is lie still and pray that the twinge goes away. What was that all about? Is some girl pal playing tricks on her and practicing her voodoo skills? Oh, what a crazy idea….
All these come to pass in a span of 9 months. Swiftly disfiguring the woman's body and altering her state of mind, the changes just happen - full of wonder. Believe me, not even the ridiculous whims were craftily commanded by the lady. It seems like the body and mind are acting on their own. In effect, the already complicated woman nature seems more unusual than she already is.
In this age of equality, independence and practicality, women opt to continue working despite the discomforts. Finances can't be stalled. With bills to settle and mortgage to sustain, hubby and wife must save up for the days when she will be out of income. For her, that's utterly dreadful! Losing her purchasing power for months! And she has to justify every bit of expense to the hubby if he is to fund her extra-curricular self-esteem boosters - especially after birth when she is desperate to regain her old form.
In the face of all these awkwardness, the pregnant woman struggles to understand herself. Marching on to find balance, with her unsteady steps, and more importantly, with life, career and love for self, husband and the little one to come.
In the end, she (and hopefully, the hubby) gets over the mystery of it all with the priceless babe in their arms.
