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How to Stay Hard

Relationship Advice

How to Stay Hard

When you’re about to have sex with someone, you want to be as hard as possible. It gives you a confidence boost which results in overall better sex.We all know what happens when the erection fades, you can see the guy’s face slowly go into a frown as he rushes to get it back into shape. Though most women don’t have an issue with this happening, many men take it personally which is understandable as the penis is a very important body part for a man, it’s the definition of masculinity.

For many men, it has nothing to do with a medical issue, rather nerves or sensation. This is normal, so, if you’re not suffering from any medical condition, you can do a couple different things to get your erection back up. So, we’re going to show you all the different things you can do to keep your erection ready for action.

It’s all in your head

Firstly, you should know that your erection is highly connected to your psychological state. If you’re stressed out, you may have a harder time becoming erect, this is normal. If your heads not in the game, how can your penis be in ready? So, if you’re having issues holding an erection, it’s important to reflect on your psychological state. Are you sick? Constantly stressed? Look at these factors when it comes to your erection. You may have to change your lifestyle as it’s clearly affecting your sex life. Try to work out, eat healthily, reduce your stress at work and, if you want, speak to a therapist. Of course, this isn’t the only reason for a limp erection, however, it’s best to start with your head first.

Change your condoms

It’s common knowledge that condoms reduce the sensation during sex. This could be a reason as to why you cannot hold an erection. Condoms can hold a tight grip around the penis, causing it to lose sensation. In addition, the condom may simply be too thick. In this case, try to opt for extra or ultra thin condoms. They are just as efficient as regular condoms, however, the skin of the condom is thinner, allowing you to feel the inside of the vagina.

If you and your partner are using other methods of birth control and you both are STI-free then you can also have sex without a condom. However, please do take extra precautions before doing so. You don’t have an unwanted pregnancy or to contract an STI.

Ease up on the drinking

If you’re typically having sex when you’ve been drinking, perhaps it’s time you tried it out when you’re sober. Alcohol has a huge influence on your sexual performance. In on instance, it can increase sexual performance, however, if you overdo it, it can result in your inability to hold an erection. Cut out a couple of beers and give it another try, maybe you’ll notice a difference.

Quit smoking

If you’re a smoker, you’re not helping out your penis at all. In fact, you’re only making your situation worse. Smoking is a classic killer of an erection. Why? Well, smoking destroys your lungs, decreasing your oxygen capacity. This results in your feeling tired and sore, thus, a limp penis. If you want more energy and a stronger erection, cut the smoking, trust me.

Focus on foreplay

Sometimes, when you rush through things, you can actually ruin your erection. Instead of rushing through to penetration, you should hold off. Focus on foreplay. Think of foreplay as a warmup, you don’t want to drive a car without heating up the engine, right? Think of your penis as the car, you need some time to warm it up. Foreplay will help hold your erection and, in addition, will increase the sexual tension between you two.

Talk to your partner

I know you may be shy to talk to your partner about this, but don’t be. You need to tell your partner if you’re having issues with your erection. Speaking to your partner will give them a better understanding of what you’re going through and they’ll take the time to help you with your erection. Perhaps they can try some things out with you and see how it goes from there.

Don’t masturbate chronically

If your chronically masturbating, as in, a couple times a day, this is probably contributing to your erectile issues. Yes, masturbation is necessary for you to do, plus it helps you control premature ejaculation. However, if you overdo it, it’ll have the reverse effects. So, masturbate but don’t go crazy.

Go the herbal way

You shouldn’t be taking chemically manufactured pills for your erection. You can easily assist your erection through herbal supplements. There are various herbal supplements to choose from. Some focus on increasing your blood circulation while others are used to naturally increase your testosterone levels. For many men, herbal remedies are highly effective in increasing your erection.

Have sex when you genuinely want to

Sometimes, people feel obligated to have sex. This could be because you and your partner live together, so, there’s this hidden pressure that you have to have regular sex. If you don’t feel like having sex, then don’t have sex. If you’re forcing yourself to have sex when you’re tired, stressed or simply unaroused, you’re not going to have an erection. So, take the night off and just watch a movie instead. No one said you had to have sex every day. Do it when you truly feel like doing it.

Keep the sex fun

If you’ve been having sex with your partner for a while, it’s normal for it to become routine. This is where you’re going to have to switch things up. Try different positions, try different types of foreplay and activities. Remember when I said that sex is psychological? Well, it could simply be that you’re bored. And if you’re bored, your partner is probably bored. So, switch things up a bit, your partner will probably be just as excited to try new things as you are.

Don’t think about last time

If this happened to you last time you had sex, don’t let that control your thoughts. You cannot base your sex life on that one time you couldn’t get hard. Every man has experienced something like this, so, you’re not alone. Enjoy the moment and indulge in foreplay. The best thing you can do is throw that experience out the door and start fresh.

Add lube

Maybe it’s just not wet enough. Yes, the vagina may be wet, however, perhaps you simply need more lubrication. If her muscles are contracting, she’ll be less wet, so, in this case, use lube. I recommend water-based lubes as they won’t affect the condom. Lube will enhance the sensation, making the sex better.

Get your sleep

If you’re not sleeping properly, your body isn’t going to function properly. In everyday life, you can probably go to work sleepy, however, if you don’t get enough sleep, you won’t be able to have sex. Your male hormones are produced while you’re in REM sleep. If you don’t get proper REM sleep then you won’t be producing high levels of male hormones. What you need to do is look at why you’re not getting enough sleep. Is it stress at work? Sleep apnoea? Figure out why you can’t sleep properly and then address the issue.


At the end of the day, it’s really just sex. People put a lot of pressure on themselves to perform outstandingly in the bedroom, but there’s no point. Don’t feel pressure to perform, what you need to do is focus on the moment with your partner instead. So, take a deep breath and just chill out, it’s going to be fine. Sex isn’t supposed to be a race to the finish line, it’s about the moment you’re sharing with another person.

Penile exercises

You probably didn’t know this but you can actually physically strengthen your penis as well. These are known as kegel workouts and is designed to strengthen the muscles around the penile area. Kegel exercises could easily help strengthen this area and ease your erectile issues. To work these muscles out, you need to flex your pelvic muscles, these are the same ones which you use to hold your pee. You should try to flex these muscles a maximum 100 times a day. Within a couple weeks, you’ll notice a huge difference.

Go to a sex therapist

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Sex therapists are designed to deal with all psychological issues revolving around sex. They may be able to highlight some issues that are causing you erectile issues which you didn’t know about. You’d be surprised what you can find out about yourself after a couple sessions with a therapist. In addition, they’ll give you the tools you need to help you with your erectile issues.

See a doctor

If literally, nothing is working, you should go to the doctor. This could be purely psychological, however, if it is medical, you need to get yourself checked out. If the doctors confirm you have an erectile disorder, they’ll provide you with the various avenues you can go down for treatment. It may be as simple as you taking a pill once a day. So, don’t be shy to go to the doctors, in the long run, it’ll help you and your sex life.

Now that you know the different ways to increase your erection, it’s time that you tried these methods out. Of course, you’re going to have to try a couple and find out which one best suits you. This is simply because everyone is different, so, some men may react positively to getting more sleep while, for others, they have to reduce their levels of masturbation. Give some of these methods a try and let us know in the comment section below which ones worked the best for you!

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